[welcome to my life] :)

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* Welcome *

Gee Jia Xin

22 Aug 1991

Seventeen going Eighteen

mylife_jiaxin91@hotmail.com

TP, HTM. Class of 1H06

Mos Memoirs

click the words at the right to navigate

Saturday, June 06, 2009

M lazy to blog lately.Haha! Well, finally finish the mid-sem tests.N its 2 weeks break now!=D But sadly, got lots of assignments n projects to do.Its so difficult to find time to mit up wif dem!=( Im lyk always planning things 2 weeks ahead, meaning my schedule is always full from now till two weeks later!Aww...Gonna manage my time well n hopefully ive got spare time to work part time n mit up wif dem as well as some time for me relax n enjoy myself!>.< I hope problems will stop persisting sfter clearing things up.Thats y when i say if wan to start afresh, i wanna delete all my memories.so i wouldnt b reminded of dem when im sad or when my imagination runs wild. Well, but i hope i'll be able to get rid of that bad habit of mine--> thinking negatively, wild imaginations, low self-esteem n etc etc.I dun give up on myself but i always wan ppl to give up on me n i dunno y!!=( mayb i dun feel any support from dem to me, dats y im so inferior to myself.I always thot, if dey give up on me, i'll prove dem wrong.But y cant i juz tink that i wan to prove dem wrong n dun disappoint dem?!O well, i shall let nature take its course.N pls, dont hide anything frm me, ok?=)

Hoping that test results will come out well n everything in life will go smoothly; peacefully. Dunno y ive been craving for good foods recently!Hmm...Ikoi, Hanabi, Marche, Pearl River, Meltz.Especially on jap foods--> sashimi!!yumm yumm...Tink my last jap food eaten was like more than 1 n a half year?-.- Gotta find a job soon to earn lotsa money, save up as well as to pamper myself!Hehez.Cuz im broke now; im penniless!o.O

Anw, gonna go AMK mit Grace n CJ for lunch later.N i'll b able to post the photos of recent activities in no time le!Muahaha...Cant wait to get my own laptop, hopefully..I reali nid one!=( mum say gonna bring me to PC show next thur, 11 jun.Haha!Hope i can get a laptop by then to do all my assignments, projects etc etc=) but on 11 jun ive got project=( forgotten that i wouldnt b free that day n now the leader doesnt wan to change the date anymore!o.O How?!Anybody advise pls....=)

# posted by LoNeLy | 10:24 AM | 0 comments

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Was too busy to blog last week.It was like projects after projects, revisions after revisions, tutorials after tutorials, interview after interview and etc etc. Got into the second round of interview for HTMIG and went for the 1st interview for SA.Im too busy for all those, but i would like to b part of dem thou=) Im oso taking part in the Asian Youth Games(AYG) dis year as well as the Olympic Youth Games(YOG) next year..Will have trainings n more trainings for dat.Pheww...

It was anniversary on thur n we went to watch Night at The Museum 2.It was nice!!Hahaz.We went to NewYork NewYork for lunch n after ordering everything, we realised that it was all seafood that we've ordered.Hmm appetiser was baked cheesy mussels, we ordered 2 soups which was clam chowder n mushroom cappucino, n the main course was a seafood platter, with crab, salmon, calamari, prawns, n fish.Ok, other then the mushrrom cappucino soup, the rest was seafood!haha. The soup was soooo damn nice!!So extraordinary!Spent a total of abt $60 on dis meal but it was quite worth it cuz we didnt eat breakfast n dinner!which means $60 for 2 person, for 3 meals n were very full.haha!lolz.Shall update u guys wif the photo probably during my break, on the 2nd week of june.=)

1st week of june is test week!so fast sia..=/ i've lots of things to do, but im in no mood for all those=( Wad ive to do today, supposingly:
- POM tutorial
- Macroecons 2 topic revison + tutorial
- Study for F&B quiz
- Research for RHT project
- Do 2 APEL personality test (which i dunno how to access the net.LOL!)
- Edit F&B presentation (which i dun think i can do today cuz no microsoft excel!)
- IHT project research, which ive yet to noe wad to research on >.<
-Check the test venues online which i cant access n dunno y!!o.O

If i juz slack throughout the day, which i feel lyk doing, i'll be doomed for the coming week.A brief intro of my schedule to welcome the new week ahead=( :

Monday having RHT project meeting during break, evening gonna do revisions.
Tuesday POM project meeting after school, evening revisions.
Wednesday, sch ends the latest, at 6pm with IHT project meeting during break n evening, revisions again!
Thursday having F%B quiz!O, so crappy, which i nid to memorise soo many things like all the different pastas, 15 different types of APPLES whick look ALIKE and much much more!!
N i dunno when will SA or HTMIG cal me up for wadeva reasons, as well as for AYG training!I wanna work to earn money but wif this busy schedule, i dunno if i can get a job!!Zzzzz.....=(

Anw, think i got to focus n TRY to do all my work today if not things will pile up!!Cya guys soon!=D

# posted by LoNeLy | 11:59 AM | 0 comments

Friday, May 08, 2009

Busy busy busy!!! Lots of things r piling up..So many project works, assignments, presentation, tutorials, revisions, n a field trip!!No printer, no microsoft office software, n the most extreme, no personal com!!How i gonna do all those work sia..all nid use com de..T_T I dun wan b lyk last thur, wrote everything down on paper, go sch den use the com during the 1 hour break n pia pia pia! Its was so stressful la..I quickly rushed the work, ran to print the assignment out for the presentation which was immediately after dat 1 hour break!But luckily, i did manage to do everything on time.I dun wan dat kind of stress again sia..Juz dun lyk the feeling of last minute work, nid pia here pia der.But i'll try to do everything now n not pile myself up with more n more work as the day goes on.

Anw, though im very busy, but i'll make the effort to blog weekly, hopefully as suggested by one of u..Cuz she say she always come my blog, n it dun seemed to b updated,lyk a dead blog..Hahaz.Alright, i'll blog whenever i've time=)

Shal start frm last friday.Wait for him to b back frm work, den we went changi V for dinner!muahaha...been waiting for it sooo long liao, n finally...=D We ate the fried baby sotong n it was reali BABY!Together with fried wantons, n chicken cutlet noodles..yummy! Was too full, so dapao the dessert back home to eat: Red Tea Longan..Shared wif him n wow, its so damn yummy!!Wanna go der again some other days=P
Craving for lots of foods dis few days sia..Hmm....Lyk popeyes, seoul garden, bbq, mos, tony, hanabi, ikoi n more...N the most extreme one which i tink i wun get to go der in the near future: Meltz the world cafe.For some who dunno, its at Oriental hotel, a buffet spread for $90++ per pax if im not wrong.with free flow champagne will b $125++.Its impossible to go der for now..Hahaz.

Been in need of money nowadays too..Dad's n mum's bday had past,n i barely made it to buy a cake for dem to blow out the candle. N wad ive got coming soon is his bday, anniversary, printing of leture notes,class funds, n all the necessary items.Im seriously broke.Wun get a chance to treat him eat dis year for his bday le.hahaz.Next year, perhaps.But of cuz i didnt missed out the cake n present.shh...=D

Anw, went Jazelle's first bday party at Hort's Park on sunday..Omg, the park is damn nice lo.lyk resort lyk dat.Did took some pictures der, shall update soon.hahaz.mayb waiting for end of may, den post all the photos one shot.guess it gonna b alot wif so many activities.haha=P

Alright, shall update u guys soon, gonna go do my work le.
-Im tired- >.<

# posted by LoNeLy | 8:28 PM | 0 comments

Friday, May 01, 2009

It seems lyk time flies in poly.Its friday again, n ive been through 2 weeks of poly life liao.Wow, dats fast.N in no time, i'll b graduating!!=D Cant wait for dat man..Wanna work n earn lots of money!! Earn money, save money n earn money, save money=P Im in love wif my course sia.I like all the subjects! RHT, IHT, POM, Macroecons, F&B n comm skills..Wah, shiok sia..all so interesting de.But there's lots of projects, assignments, revision n etc etc to do thou.Nevertheless, i shld b happy dat i like wad im doing n learning..Passion to success!=)

Anw, ytd got "scolded" by a stupid bus driver which i feel very BU GAN YAN!!Its lyk...... Ok,it happens lyk dat: when i board the bus n tap my ezlink card, the sound was those student fare card while the rest of the ppl were those adult de sound.Then the driver called me, in a NOT-so-friendly tone, of cuz.Ask me give him my card n fiercely, he ask my IC number.Cuz he thot i using other ppl's card juz to enjoy the privilege of the student fare.So happily, i told him my IC number.N oopz, it telly the number on my ezlink(which he was holding in his hand).Den wad?He LL lo, ask me where i schooling.So i juz said TP without giving a damn.N he told me off, "TP, den ur dis card cannot use le hor..!!Dis card overdue liao hor..!!" Den i was lyk WTF?!So calmly, i juz tell him I KNOW.N said i was frm JC n transferred to TP dats y im still holding on to my student card.But guess wad, he nv even give a damn to listen!F-up..Den he diao me, n say "U know den good!So better go change n stop using dis card". At the juncture, i reali bui gam wan sia..Its lyk in the first place, the tertiary card is not ready, how m i gonna use it?! Secondly, every freshmen in TP is currently using the secondary card but the sound of my ezlink card differ cuz i extended its expiry date when i was posted to JC the other time. N thirdly, he's working wif the company n he dun even noe the company's system, now anyhow shoot ppl.WTH la...Its lyk every single secondary graduate's ezlink card was automatically switched to adult fare on 1st Feb, to b exact.If i was not posted to a JC, how m i gonna use the student fare price wif dat ezlink card?!Kinda stupid rit? Its not up to me to use adult or stident fare, moreover, i havent got my tertiary card yet. I wanted to take down his name sia, but forgot== to lodge a COMPLAIN!! Den i complained darling when i reached home.He said i shld have at least note the plate number, so the company can tract who is the driver at that point of time, at that place.Wasted...!! I HATE ppl who say or scold or shout at me for no reason or without hearing me out first!!ESPECIALLY when im NOT in the wrong!!T_T How i wish someone was there to help me speak up=( althoguh ive lots to shoot back at the driver then, but i juz simply dun wan to bother to talk or clear things wif anyone who dun give a damn.Juz let dem b, n i juz try to forget everythign on my part...-.-

Lastly, i cant wait for a wardrobe overhaul sia..So many nice clothes i saw but cant buy=( ppl always say i dun wan dress nicer.U tink i dun wan meh?How i wish i can b juz lyk any other girls out der la, buy whatever they lyk n need, dress nicely.Now i cant even get wad i NEED, not to say wad i lyl. Someone told me before, buy nice clothes is not = need to have a lot money.True, cuz we dun have to go for branded goods if we cant afford.But problem is..Clothes nowadays cheapest it can go oso lyk $20+ or $30+ EACH.If u buy 2 or 3, den will b lyk close to $100?N u noe, even if u buy 3, its not even enough to change or play abt wif the fashion of ur clothes lo.Haiz..Im despo for money!!T_T wif celebrations coming up, n need to get so many things!!Plus those small little amt dat adds up lyk printing of assignments, notes, etc..N still nid buy portfolio bla bla bla...Im alrdy squeezed DRIED.No money left, no allowance anymore for now..How m i gonna save up for those things that i need sia?Im alrdy saving, skipping lunch or sometimes, even dinner bcuz im peniless!!sobsobz.T_T Got to find a job real soon..

Ok, wad a long post today..gtg do my work le..C you guys soon!=D

# posted by LoNeLy | 12:23 PM | 0 comments

Friday, April 24, 2009

So far so good, adapting fairly well to the poly way of life=)but im broke!!=( need lots of money sia..wif so many events coming up in my personal life, as well as to join in all the class activities!! Ranging from the many bday celebrations of my fellow classmates, to having breakfast/lunch wif dem, and oso watching movie during our long breaks!! I've been paying for orientation, bday party n those books/notes! N the books dun come cheap la..=.= thought i'll b receiving daily allowance, enough for me to save up for those special occasions lyk mum n his bday,anniversary n etc etc..but seems lyk im not getting allowance on a daily basis.Plus im using the allowance im getting to pay for those books/notes n etc needed for lectures n tutorials..In addition, still gotta save the small amount of allowance given for those special days! Ahh...Im seriously broke man..Havent count the days when ive to stay in sch till evening, n gonna have my meals outside== Man, someone save me!!
-Will a miracle happen?-

Anw gtg prepare to go sch for lecture le..Update u guys soon wif all the overdue photos n hopefully, i can get my own laptop SOON!!How i wish i can own my very own laptop, n nobody will "steal" it frm me!But i think i've to wait for the next ITfair before i can get my own laptop.N for the time being, hopefully projects, research n those online works dun flood me, cuz i will not have my own com or even laptop to do things at my own pace!!>.<

# posted by LoNeLy | 8:47 AM | 0 comments

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Its been super long since i last blog.Lazy ma.Haha,lol. First of all, poly is starting..Today is the last day to go out, enjoy n relax!! Having mixed feelings sia...Hmm nervous, anxious, excited, but yet sort of scared at the same time.I miss zhss!! The teachers, frens n the class!T_T remembered the times when we hang out after sch.The silly things we do in class.The way we were united n cared for each other.We played, studied, go out, have fun n enjoyed together. Though sometimes we were scolded n despised, we still stand as 1 n work our way thru.Its all these imperfect times that make us perfect.Aww...Reali miss them sia..Not forgetting the times before Os, when we still take things so easily, didnt reali study sooo hard n we were still fooling around.N when Os were round the corner, i remembered how we chiong together n help each other.Though many a times we were looked down at.ppl thought we were the lousy ones, the rotten apples. They thought our studies sucks n whatever bad things that happen will always be pointed at us thou we didnt do anything. That is when whatever we do is always wrong.. For 5 years, we accepted the fact that we were normal students n endured all the different looks ppl gave us for being normal students. But see, wad we've got now? Some of our results were somewhat better than the express students or on par!Remembered wad some of us say the other time, that we wanted to prove those ppl wrong by showing them our results.N we did it!=)Well, anw we have to move on in live n all those times we had together will b stored as memories, which i believe will live in the hearts of ours, forever...
Memories of 4n1'07; 5n1'08...
-Myself, Xueni, Grace, Peishan, Chaojun, May, Finna, Junyee, Michelle, Mabel, Huiying, Peijie, Elaine, Vivian, Vanessa, Daryl, John, Shenmin, DarrenTan, DarrenOng, Samuel, Seowying, Sheryl, Andy, Shaun, Leroy, Chengyong, Yixuan, Xueqi, Shiaotze, Qini, Sharifah, Yurong, Ivan, Tailim, Jeremy, Yeeyit, Rieyee, Luming, Sinmei, Xinni, Lihua, Wenlei-
Dat makes it us..All the best in our future endeavours!!kampeteh=)

# posted by LoNeLy | 1:20 PM | 0 comments

Friday, February 06, 2009

Hello dead blog!Super long since i last blogged.I wan a laptop, a camera as well!=( but well,i shld put my wants away n focus on my needs.delayed gratitude!=) now i need to earn n save lots of money!haha.so i'll b prepared in case of a rainy day.hehez.xD

Anw,was posted to SRJC.Started sch on monday.first day was very bored cuz dun even noe anyone in my group n the breaks were so long!The briefings were super boring too!!zzz... Wed learnt the college dance,cheer n song!lol. i tink i've been hearing the college song continously for abt 10 times?=S but the dance was quite interesting (but if oni someone i knew better were to b my partner that day..hmm lyk my sisterz?or perhaps him.haha). ytd n today had those sample lectures.its interesting thou.time flew dis two days.haha.next week gonna have orientation le.whee!! hope my group wil b having the amazing race around singapore instead of the station games in the college-.- although the sch looks quite old,but i lyk the system.oni tue n thu nid to wear sch uni,other den that, can wear the college tee!so cool!plus sch starts oni at 8.30 instead of the usual 7.30 on fridays!so shiok,while the teachers have to do morning exercise.wahaha=)but i dun lyk the stressful education, the A-level=( shld i stay in SR or move on to TP?well,i shall wait for the appeal results bfore i decide.can think thru it in the meantime=)

# posted by LoNeLy | 6:59 PM | 0 comments

Monday, November 17, 2008

Its been a long time since i last blogged.well, no chance.haha.finally, Os r over!Whee!!At lan shop wif him n his frens now,the only chance for me to blog.lol.

Its been a tired week last week.Sun, went to his fren's hse n played poker till dawn n slp for a short while. Mon, went wild wild wet till evening, then to T3 to have popeye for dinner.No time to study for tue's mcq!haha. Tue, last O level paper in the morning.Went to play lan wif him n his frens during midnite.Wed, slpt for awhile after lan trip then pei him go MOM in the late morning followed by cruise in the afternoon.To port klang n langkawi!haha.Came back on saturday and by the time reach home,straight away drift into dreamland for 17 hours.shagged sia.During the cruise,nv slp for the 3 nites.all the nites spent in casino.haha.lol.but i nv play wor. -.- Yup, bcuz i was away on cruise,dats y didnt got the chance to attend class chalet.Aww...

Anw i got my hair dyed today=) n in the midst of the holiday fun,i suddenly thought of the LCCI exam on wed.Lucky remembered sia.lol.im sure der's a number of u out der oso forgot abt dis exam rit?haha

Anw,still going cruise again frm 14-17 dec to penang n phuket.wif mum,bro,him n one of his fren plus a big group of my mum's frens.whee!gonna get a camera, hopefully by then, so can take as many pics as i wan! Now i noe y im gaining weight.bcuz im enjoying too much!6 meals a day onboard the cruise n its buffet!Woah,imagine how much excess calorie m i consuming daily?=.=

# posted by LoNeLy | 11:39 PM | 0 comments

Thursday, August 28, 2008

Forth day of prelim...It was screwed up!! O man..T_T ss n eng cant finish..poa was so wasted!The stupid balance sheet..Bcuz i wrote all the adjustments at the side of the question paper, but when i transfer those to the answer sheet, i took it for granted that all the adjustments that i wrote was for the p&l, so i left out the prepayment n accruals for the balance sheet! N it was the very moment i stepped out of school that i noticed y i cant balance the balance sheet!! Argh, stupid me, plus the calculation for accounting ratio!Y did i stop myself from doing the forth part first before i do the third part!?Bcuz of that, i cant do the next question!Haix..1 more week of prelims..Hope it gonna b well..If not it gonna b hard to ans to others..U noe wad i mean..=(

Anw, im now at Cathay with my sis!Hahaz..Juz finish our lunch frm carrefour n now going catch the movie titled Death Race wif dem soon cuz we find it too early to go home after the eng paper juz now which ended before 10..N since tmr is juz the circuit race n no exams, we decided to relax ourselves awhile today!Hahaz..xD

N btw, haiz..Feeling so inferior abt myself..I dunno y im dis way, but perhaps its better after someone explain the reason to me that der is no nid for inferiority..But despite, there will b a feeling der more or less!My character which had follwed me for 17 years wouldnt fate off so fast juz by an explanation rit?Haiz..Nvm, its no point me broading over it since i've talked it out..Nothing can wind back time n redo the whole process again..Perhaps i was wrong..I juz if anything goes wrong next time, someone would talk it out nicely instead of making myself feel so damn guilty n inferior towards the person..I mean, yea, i noe they r words of anger, but u noe how much it hurts? Perhaps its me taking things too seriously or negatively but i juz noe im more sensitive den others..So of cuz words den to revolve around my mind for quite some time, n if i say im hurt, i mean so..It gonna b a scar in der more or less no matter wad..If u put urself in my shoe, wouldnt u feel the same?Haiz..Nvm, i dun mean anything rit here..Im juz passing a casual remark..So dont take anything to heart..Read n forget..=.=

Ok, gtg catch the movie le..C you guys..N jiayou for prelims!=)

# posted by LoNeLy | 1:00 PM | 0 comments

Saturday, August 23, 2008

Whee, went popeye eat wif my family on thur at the Singapore Flyer..They lyk the biscuit n sides too! Well, its nice..Hahaz..N we were all very full to finish everything on the table so he had to finish up those..My poor boy..Hahaz

Was greeted by a big card placed on my table when i reached school yesterday.. Well, its none other than the card which they spend some time doing despite the coming exams..Thanks! Btw,am wondering who's the mastermind for the billingual bday song after recess..Anw thanks ppl..Hahaz..=P

Went to meet him in the evening n went to Pearl River Palace for the ala-carte buffet dinner..Woah,the foods r nice! Services r good too..When we first walk in, his first impression was, "hmm, is it a bit too class for us?" Hahaz..Anw, manage to catch some parts of thge firework display when we were about to go home..xD

Afterall, wan to thank my sis for the WWW trip, YY dinner, everything they had done n frens for their gifts n well wishes..Not forgetting, leslie too, for the dinner at YY again,straight after the day when i go eat wif them..As well as darling, for all..Hehez..Once again, thanks ppl for making my day..=P

Here r some photos of the day:

This is wad exactly it was lyk when i first walk in to class..=P

The cake frm them=)

At YY...

The cake frm him..

N some photos taken long ago....

Photos frm his bday..Whipped Cream Facial Party!Hahaz

As well as some of his ORD photos..Doubt you can spot him..=P

At the Parade..

N cookhouse..

Candid wif his frens at the parade..Or is it posing for another cam?Hahaz

Back at hm..

Lunch at Ikoi..(ORD loh!!)

The sashimi..

I know u r tired by now, but hang on..Juz some of the Cruise Photos! xD

At Harbourfront Centre

After all the wait before boarding..

At Penang..

At Phuket..

Its dark here thou..=P

Disfigured..

# posted by LoNeLy | 2:29 PM | 0 comments

Sunday, August 03, 2008

Finally, a chance to blog after a long long time..-.- It was difficult without com.No online, no net surfing, blogging etc n etc..Cant even do my fnn coursework peacefully n it got so troublesome at times..

Anw, yesterday went eat Pariss with leslie n him..Got to catch part of the NDP preview..I mean seeing the fireworks..N the parachutist..Hahaz..Perhaps going der again next week on the actual day..xD After dat went airport with a few others to study till dis morning..Yup, its tiring..Hahaz..Lolz..=P

O n btw, those overdue pictures frm his ord, our anniversary n cruise trip as well as xn bday shall b posted sometime later..Dun have the time to go upload, moreover, without a com at hm!!Cant wait to own one com myself, which i mean i DUN have to pass it on to my bro after his is OUT OF ORDER!o.O

# posted by LoNeLy | 2:06 PM | 0 comments

Saturday, June 07, 2008

Traumatised: Its back after 3 months..Scary too, thou not as serious as the past..But i wonder when will dis reali ever stop..Helpless but to juz sit back n wait for the time to come dat it'll nv happen again ..Haix..

Excited: Finally, the real start of sch holiday thou still have to pia for O-level..Going on cruise once again tmr..xD Its nor virgo dis time, but aquarius instead, to penang n phuket for those who r curious..=P It'll be my first time alighting the cruise for tour n back to the cruise again..Wonder how the experience gonna be but i believe it gonna b a great n enjoyable one..=) Will b back on thur n shall update photos taken der when i have the time..See you guys soon n ppl involved in the National Youth Envirolympics Challenge next saturday, jiayou! B sure dat my team will beat you guys! Muahaha..jkjk! -.-

# posted by LoNeLy | 8:00 PM | 0 comments

Thursday, May 29, 2008

Sianz..Fnn again..Daily till 5..While others r home, or rather, outside enjoying, im stuck in dis room doing the bloody coursework..Im persevering, im growing my beansprout..I hope the beansprout will grow well and pay off next year when i get my results..=P but i doubt so..T_T

Always looking forward, trying ways to get it..But its not helping..Its always been worst..I dunno wad's wrong, is it something going wrong here or der..Pls figure it out..N not drag dis on anymore, for it's always been bothering me for quite some time now..Or mayb the problem lies here..Ok den,if it is,i shall stop everything by all means..Since its always the wishing n clamour from dis side that had turned everything bad,den perhaps by stopping everything, it'll b better? Will it?I dunno, but perhaps, at least better i guess..
At that moment, i was reali..Ermm..Nvm, i shall skip dat..As usual, i was high looking for it..Although i noe it'll oni hurt me, i'll feel better at heart..But i remembered one of u said before, by doing so, it doesnt solve the prob..So yup, dis sentence came to my mind n i decided not to broad over it for i will feel no better but worse instead..I let it go frm my heart for a few minutes, think of other stuffs instead n i felt much better! Now im thinking, y did i get so woke up n upset?Actuali, it doesnt matter to me! Thx to that special person who told me the sentence before!=) Perhaps i shld learn dis n let it go for as long as possible, till it get off my mind totally..I noe i'll b better, n i can get back to those days..xD Yup, it doesnt matter to me, i shldnt bury myself into it..

-Awake;Grown Up-

# posted by LoNeLy | 2:28 PM | 0 comments

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Happy anniversary!The countdown had ended=) time is short, i've oni got 24hrs or less to celebrate dis special day with u..Gonna make full use of it..Hahaz..My countdown for dis year had ended, wad abt urs?When will it end n start again with a special journey of ours?Im waiting..=P

Anw, hope u'll enjoy ur day n stay cheerful forever..=) Once again, happy anniversary to my special u..<3

# posted by LoNeLy | 5:32 PM | 0 comments

Saturday, May 17, 2008

Back to square 1..I've got no com liao..Cuz had to shift to my bro's room..Great den, it'll be more inconvenient for me to do my fnn coursework too liao..Lolz..Dat will mean less blogging too..Hahaz..Ok, let's start wif last week..

9 May: Rotting whole day till nite time den go eat durian wif him, jy, les, francis, aaron+gf..After dat went back to my hse to repair my com..After repairing, it was past midnight le..

10 May: The big day..Brought the cake to his side n blindfolded him after the bday song..N guess wad?Francis, les n me gave him free facial! Wonder wad's the facial mask made of? Whipped Cream!! Wahaha..Actuali thought y he so guai, nv resist..But of cuz, he retaliated, after our "job" is done..Hahaz..Shall update the photos next time..=P but wad a pity, didnt get the chance to take a photo of the cake..Cuz after much fooling around, the candle had melted part of the cake..Shld have let him blow out the candle first..Lolz! Went to joaquim with les n him at nite..Dunno if he lyk the overall planning, but darling, hope u'd enjoyed ur day..Hehez..xD

11 May: Went to work wif him, Once again!!=)Brought back the memories at mos, though the venue was different n seldom get to see him around during work..Hahaz..But the same old "shy" feeling, only at work..Dunno y too..Well, dat's me..Hehez

12 May: Fnn practical..Finally got the photo taken le..No more of those tiring shit!Hahaz..

13 May: Went to watch movie wif him after 10 weeks of waiting..Overall, enjoyed myself..=P u had spent quite a lot too darling..-.-

14-16 May: got back mid-year results..Well, expected..Mayb its a wake up call for me..Got to work hard le if not when next year get back O's results, dunno how to face my parents n everyone else..O, yea..N wad a fun learning carnival for us..Ok, it was re-named as "pace"..Yup, had timed-practice all day long..Plus the hell fnn ssp on fri..Damn long sia..But no choice, its all part of O-level..I've got to persevere till the end of Os..Den can relax n enjoy!! ppl der, jiayou too eh..=)

Ok,till here..gtg le..If not he's waiting for me n rotting le..Hahaz..See you guys..xD

# posted by LoNeLy | 2:28 PM | 0 comments

Friday, May 02, 2008

Busy wif the coming up exams for the past few days, or weeks? Hahaz..Actuali thought of coming back this site to blog oni after the mid-years but felt dat i must blog on dis once-in-a-lifetime special day of urs..To keep the memories of the day..=)

Feeling high in spirits n happy today..Cuz finally,the big day has come..After a long long wait, dis day had come..Frm ur very first parade-->the POP, to the second one on the red beret presentation, and now finally, the third and last parade--> ur ORD!! No more waiting,overseas trip,or confinement le!Wahaha.. A joy and occasion to celebrate for the nite!=D M happy for u n congrats to u on dis special day of urs after all the hardships u've gone thru..=) Cant wait to see u der tonite..N hmm..Oso mit the parents session??Hahaz..Whatever it may b, i juz cant wait for the nite to fall..xD Hoping to cya real soon!<3

# posted by LoNeLy | 2:55 PM | 0 comments

Friday, April 11, 2008

Went T3 on thur with him on thur to have popeye for dinner..The chicken, fries n mashed potatoes r nice!Haven got the chance to try the other side dishes yet..Hahaz..Mayb u guys shld try it someday too=) But tink oni airport T1 and T3 have nia..Hahaz

Finally, friday is here again..Always looking forward to fridays..Hahaz..Went to celebrate dad's bday juz now..Hmm, perhaps a 3 in 1 celebration? Dad's bady, mum's promotion n also mum's coming up bday?Hahaz..Hope dad enjoyed his day cuz seldom have the chance to accompany him n to go out wif him..Hahaz..So hope dis dinner is satisfactory n enjoyable for him though its a simple one..I told him i'll bring him go eat good food when i have the money..Wonder how long he gotta wait sia..Hahaz..Anw, of cuz was sadden by it la..Was tinking if u cant do such a simple ting, den next time how?U tink dis can do for the long run?Since u r not guilty of anyting, den y cant u juz "fulfill" it?By not doing so, u oni sadden the other party..Or shld i say disappoint?Wadever it may b..Juz dun see the point in doing so if there's no particular reason..Well, as said, im letting it go..I'll not bother so much liao..Its ur liking afterall..So long it pleases u, u feel better by doing so or whatever it may b,den so b it..Yes, i may not feel good juz yet, but i wun flare up..So dun worry..Cuz i dun see a point shld i bicker over such small matters or similar to it..As long as u noe wad u r doing, u lyk it can liao..Juz give me sometime to adjust to dis principle..Its the best way out, i tink? Yea, i was very tired den..Plus dis issue, it makes me even more tired..Im glad i didnt say anyting..Cuz dat will bring me one step closer to my new set of principle=) So u see the reason y i was lyk dat den..I needed some space to tink abt the principle, to cool myself down,n to stop myself frm tinking of all those that will make me flare up..So yup, no doubts abt the situation den le?

# posted by LoNeLy | 10:34 PM | 0 comments

Wednesday, April 09, 2008

Finally completed the homework, revision for test, and fnn coursework..Damn tired sia..Hahaz..Lolz..Not to say abt the 5 items test juz now..Aching all over even before the test bcuz of the trial the day before?Yea, great, every move is a pain now..Hahaz..Well, great workout too..xD anw gtg off to bed le if not i'll fall aslp in class tmr..Lolz!!

# posted by LoNeLy | 12:41 AM | 0 comments

Tuesday, April 08, 2008

First, congrats to u mum, for ur long waited promotion, n finally it's been a success..=) hope it'll be a good start for u n everything turns out well n fine..xD

Second, a disappointment for the poa test?Wad a result..Perhaps i had not been studying..Perhaps dis is a wake up call for to start my engine n focus into my studies before its too late..Yea, 3 mths had gone n now its the forth mth..I hope its still not too late for me to catch up..Although im looking forward to graduate frm zhss, im oso anxious abt the national exams coming up in half a year's time..I wonder how i'll fare, whether i can get the results i wan, or will it be a repetition of the psle results 4 n a half years ago?

Thirdly, i hadnt been watching tv shows for ages since last year?I've missed out my favourite drams n variety shows..But yet, i havent get the chance to study..Perhaps of the piles n stacks of hw n errands i've got to do? Yea, speaking of dat, i still gotta go complete my fnn coursework, maths hw n revision for tmr's test..

Guess it'll b tiring tmr with eng timed-practice n 5 items test? Plus after a long day, still have to learn phy for test on thur..My weakest subject which i've least confidence in!!Argh..Tink i gtg finish up the piles of work before its too late for the day..Goodbye!=)

# posted by LoNeLy | 9:17 PM | 0 comments

Sunday, April 06, 2008

Back as one..Recovered, or not?I dunno..Perhaps recovered, but the scar in the heart wil stil b der..I noe it wun do juz by me broading over it..I'll try to find ways out for myself, to get rid of this scarred-in-the-heart feeling..So dun worry, but nv do dat again, i hope..Hoping dat everything will go back as one, lyk in the past..Will it?Will u promise the things u had said, n will u do it given some time?I've given u my trust once more, n i hope i dun get hurt n fall again..

Phew..Cooking is tiring but i dunno y, im juz so into it..Hahaz..Spent quite a sum of money on those ingredients to practice for fnn practical..Wads most wasted is dat the dishes didnt turn out well..Lolz!Lucky it isnt the practical day itself..Hahaz..

Dat is when i noe i have the feeling for u..I feel so being taken care of..=D Whatever i say to u, im juz having ur interest at heart, hoping u'll have a better life in future..Isnt it my purpose?If not i wun say things for no reson rit?=) But anw,thx for those times..xD Precious moments stored as memories forever in my heart..<3

# posted by LoNeLy | 7:56 PM | 0 comments

Thursday, April 03, 2008

I've learnt to let go...It has always been wif the direction of the wind, the time...How i wish it will remain der at "1" n not grow...Anw, for caring frens who've seen n notice it,dun worry, im all rit..=) Its juz an act of anger at dat moment..It was my 1st attempt..Although i've thought of doing dis 2 years ago,i juz couldnt bear the scar n pain,so i juz resisted..Now dat i did,perhaps a light one (since its the 1st attempt), if u can imagine, dat was how hurt i was deep inside den..Every line has a meaning to it, n each n everyone of it represents the number of pierces i have in my heart..The sharp pains i had on it is = to the pains i have in my heart..I thought dis was the lightest ting i can treat myself since i've reali thought of wilder ideas..Den, i told myself i have to do something so that i can get it out of my heart, once n for all..I feel lyk screaming my heart off den, but i couldnt..Thus, resulting in dis..Well, perhaps it has been hiding for too long a time n it is time it explode..Although i didnt feel great, i felt slightly better den=) At dis juncture, i've learnt to get hold of myself, to control myself n to let go of things too..

Anw, i've learnt the mistake of not forming a sentence wif "although....but...."!! So dun aim at me everytime!! Wahaha...=D Although i have the habit to use it, im learning to kick dat habit away!! Lyk now..=) Yeah, didnt i juz made it?Wahaha..Lolz..xD Learnt a new knowledge frm dajie n xiaomei abt the wind pipe thing de..Hahaz..Lolz..Im glad i told u guys abt it, n i get to learn something now..=)

Gtg study for test le..Tmr got 2 tests..Lolz..Next week will gonna be a busy week too..Hahaz..jiayou ppl..=) Cya!

Labels: `

# posted by LoNeLy | 7:00 PM | 0 comments

Monday, March 31, 2008

A rare day dat we dun have any ssp...Supposed to be happy? Or sad? Perhaps happy for me at the beginning, but sad as time went by...I neglected them times and again for a supposing good cause to me, but u failed to show me that its worthwhile me doing it...Instead, u disappoint me times and again..T_T As mentioned, its a rare day dat we dun have any ssp...So when will u get another "good" chance of me fang xue so early? I mean, at least earlier den usual...Well, if u'll b wondering, den here's my advise: happy waiting...Probably after my Os...

I juz dunno how to express myself! I have lots of thoughts, reasons n stuffs running in mind when i ponder into it..But i dun tink i wanna state it out here...I juz........ Argh!! The feeling of u having loads to explain ur points to someone, but u juz nv get the chance to do so, nv get the chance to write out or to say to anyone else...Instead, all u can do is to have it cooped it all up in ur heart, making a deep cut right thru, leaving a wound taking forever to recover...The feeling juz sucks!Argh, dat's wad im feeling rit now!! Y can.... Nvm, i shant say...Although i reali wished i can at last, one day, take it all off my chest,i noe the day wun come...Cuz i noe myself, i wouldnt wan dis to lead to more n more doubts..But if i dun say, how r u ever gonna noe how exactly i feel? Argh, nvm, nobody will juz understand me...I shall juz understand myself..T_T

Ok,since u said dat, i'll show u i can do it den...Although im being myself now, n its tough,i'll stil gonna try very very hard to overcome all these, to b a whole new me...Probably dat will stop all this wild thoughts, imagination n comparison running thru...Will dat sastify u? Ok,im sry, i shant vent my anger here..But i meant wad i said..I juz hope dat u'll set sometime aside to tink of ur "balancing"...U tink u r reali balancing?Well, being lenient, probably a 40% is all that i can comment...I noe its not good for negligence, but if u r reali balancing, dat will b a 50-50 rit? If not there will b a lose out of 10% on the other side rit?
Juz wanted to ask how do u feel if u r expecting someting frm someone, whatever it may b, n u r thinking so hard of it, ways to break thru it so as to stop waiting, but in the end found dat the someone whom u r expecting something frm is thinking nth of it, juz being happy-go-lucky? Mayb i shall rephrase dat--> u've been waiting n thinking all along, hoping the other party will react or sth, but in the end they r juz not bothered by it, having their usual fun cycle, n dun even noe how the opposite party is feeling n/or thinking... How would dat feel? Haiz, im through wif it...I dun wanna stay at this site pondering into more imaginary n wild thoughts, leaving myself wif only a deeper cut piercing thru my heart....Juz treat it as dis post nv existed n i nv said anyting ok?Treat it as its all rubbish n nonsensical craps here....
-A Bleeding Heart-

# posted by LoNeLy | 7:57 PM | 0 comments

Saturday, March 22, 2008

Learnt a new dish today..Hahaz..xD im recalling all other food recipes dat i've saw..Anw,if u dunno,cooking is my favourite!But i dun have the time n money to cook n explore everyting i wan..Although i love cooking,but i dun lyk doing the courework for fnn!It gives, not oni me, but to all my frens headache!Especially when the deadline is near n u r stuck, dunno wad to do next or wad to edit wif the previous work!ARgh...So i chose not to sit down n do anything to it first..Btw i finally can sit make myself sit down n complete the homework for dis weekend(excluding fnn)!Hahaz..Hope i can continue throughout till O's..Lolz..=D

Anw a repeat of yesterday?Lolz!Im tired of it! Bcuz of such small matters?I didnt noe how to give in so i chose to "flare" up..But in the end i managed to type out a msg..Lolz..It may sound weird to u after reading dat cuz it was lyk a split personality?But its not..Dats wad i truly wanted to say n expressed myself on the line but couldnt find a way to say it cuz it was lyk in the middle of something?Lolz..Anw, i juz hope dat u got my msg n noe wad i meant n how i felt..
-cheerz-

# posted by LoNeLy | 9:48 PM | 0 comments

Friday, March 21, 2008

Had a fun day today...Hahaz....Walking around the whole day n finally got the tings out frm our hearts....=D
But .... Lolz! Juz before i reach hm....Argh! I juz wan to get dis out of my heart! When u said dat, i wanted to tell u the fact but u acted as though i reali was wif anyone else. In fact, i was wif..... Ermm....Nvm...I shant say...After putting down the phone, had a private number missed call n i thought was u so i called back but i knew it wasnt u as ur phone wasnt on.. When u msg me, i replied, though a bit later cuz was away frm my hp but i doubt u receive it rit? Must have switched ur phone le.. Tried calling u a few times but couldnt get thru n finally, i did.. N i noe u was very tired, dats y slping so early, but thought i could explain to u first before u go to bed. But in the end wad did u said?? Grr...I juz wanna clear my conscience but u dun seems interested..U shun me off instead, saying its me blah blah blah n juz couldnt wait to say the word goodbye.. Lolz! U tink if i dun wanna chat, i'll bother to call u?If i reali didnt bother, i would have juz give up calling u after trying a few times..Why would i wan to keep trying? Cuz i was tinking positively, tinking dat when i call u n u ask me abt it, i can tell u the fact..But it turned out totally unexpected, a 100% different response..Nvm, tink whatever way pleases u ba..I've nv wanted to talk to u dis way..I wished i could treat u the way i wrote to u dat day, but u juz wouldnt allow me too..I noe i shld have juz told u the fact frm the start but wad u said pissed me off dats y i couldnt b bothered at dat moment..But didnt i call u back wanting to explain but u insisted on ur ways...Lolz..Well, mayb its bcuz u tink its reali the fact dat u tink since i nv tell u any other tings..Sighs...

Anw, finally get it off my heart...Though not to u, but at least i expressed myself, i feel better...Nvm... Ok, im tired too..With all the works, homeworks, outings n etc etc...Still have tons of things to edit to my coureswork n i dun even noe where i shld start wif n wad r we supposed to do...Lolz...N the deadline is drawing very very near!! Argh...
-stressed and confused-

# posted by LoNeLy | 10:05 PM | 0 comments

Saturday, March 15, 2008

After so much, i stil prefer mos though the pay may b slightly lower..I dun lyk working the current one!Argh, irritating!But im thinking positively, i believe i can continue n make it thru the next few weeks, n i will..After dis few weeks,i'll cut down the number of working days/hours..Im simply doing dis now cuz i nid the money desperately dis 2 mths for a lot of stuffs to b done..I'll endure thru all odds n make my way thru..Dis is my will, i believe i can..xD But dat will oso mean dat i'll not have enough allowance n savings for any other things after dis 2 mths or rather end of the year..I'll save up on my pocket money for those expenses,but although it is not enough for the end-of-year events, a bit is better den nothing, rit?=)Anw meal times dosent have to b a luxurious, expensive n classy one..So long its spent wif ur loved ones,anyting is juz fine n perfect..Budget ones tastes as well,juz lyk the lunch..Dad, thx for always cooking for us..:) I must reali say u cook well, n i enjoy ur food=D I wanna learn n pick up the skills frm u cuz im interested,but sometimes im juz busy..Im schooling on weekdays, out on weekends..Though u wun get to see this post, i hope u sense it n understand wad i mean..:) I'll try to save some times for learning frm u k?=D

Today's a fine saturday, its rare dat im at hm all day till work time..Hahaz..2 more weeks,n im counting down..Im waiting too..Jiayou wor..N b back real soon wif me,yeah?<3 So fast sch gonna start again liao..Left wif 7 more mths before grad nite..=D n O's too..Friends n ppl out der involved,jia you wor..Our last battle..Persevere thru!=D

# posted by LoNeLy | 2:16 PM | 0 comments

Saturday, March 08, 2008

This blog is rotting..Hahaz..Anw, 6 days had past..Which means stil got abt 21 days..Stil a long way..Haiz..Saded, im so lonely..Faster come back leh, wil ya? I starting work on monday le..Wonder how it'll go..But im working not bcuz to neglect my studies, but to earn more money..Seeing my savings,tink im stil short of some cash for the upcoming events dat i nid to spend on..Hence the decision, n i can also save up for a rainy day..But nevertheless, i wil not give up on my studies dis year de..I'll work towards my goal, my dream..Hahaz..Lolz..=P

# posted by LoNeLy | 11:35 AM | 0 comments

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Its exactly 3 mths frm now....Im counting down,n im sure u r doing the same rit? Cuz i noe u huo bu qi dai dat day....Hahaz....=P finally the date is getting nearer! Im so looking forward to it....=]

13 more book in-s for u....U nv noe how's the feeling lyk to me everytime when the clock is ticking for u to book in....Haiz....Sometimes the feeling hits juz when u r going back, while sometimes it can last the whole day....Sighs....U wun noe how dis feeling is lyk n how sulky it may get....T_T but nvm,i'll juz endure for 13 times more or the last 3 mths....xD but before dat,another 1 mth apart....It's been 3 weeks on 2 occasion, n now it gonna b ONE mth!! Argh....Wonder how i gonna spend those days,especially if something's not rit at hm,tink i'll have to bare it myself le....Saded....May the 3 mths pass lyk how the wind is blowing now! -.-

Wad's more i wonder how i gonna spend cny eve....First,i dunno how well (or rather,bad) the dinner will the turn out....Next,after mum's left,i wonder how i gonna spend it....Stay at hm with the super duper quiet atmosphere? Or shld i go out n roam the streets? Haiz....I juz ponder y cant my family b lyk others?All i nid is juz half of wad others get....Its simply good enough for me....

-Lonely-

# posted by LoNeLy | 6:53 PM | 0 comments

Saturday, January 26, 2008

My blog's rotting....Hahaz....Lolz....Sometimes i do wonder if i juz juz delete my blog cuz i tink im wasting my time here....But anw,for the meantime,i tink i'll juz maintain it for the occasional posts....

Yesterday was O-level results' release....To my cousins n frens--Well done n best wishes! Next year at dis time will b my turn....I wonder how i'll fair....Im aiming high but im not expecting it....Perhaps i shld wish to get my ideal grade n move on to the course i wan n dats satisfactory for me le....

Anw,i loathe ppl who lie/disappoint another person (especially close ones)....I dun see a point in lying for if the person have found out the fact,den his/her reputation will rot....No matter how good r u at heart in the near future/future,dis matter will always lie in the person's (the one who have found out the fact) heart....Unless until u clarify it one day....N im sure it gonna b a mess wif conflicts....Wad's more how r u going to do so if u had lied n the other person who came to know abt it didnt confront u abt the matter?Doesnt dat spoil ur own reputation in the person's heart?N oso make the trust in both parties fragile? Disappointment is oso another issue....Dat will do no benefit/cure but instead oni hurt to the someone u've disappoint,especially when the person have so much trust in u,n is close to u....So ppl out der,tink before u act....Once u've done something,there's no way for a u-turn....Rmb, wad's done cannot b undone....

Juz now went to city hall wif jy,f,l n him....Watched Rambo 4....M18(violence) de....First time....Hahaz....Actuali thought will get checked....But fortunately not....Wahaha....=P though it was oni an mere evening spent,but was quite tired le....Slpt the whole journey back hm....xD tmr gonna meet him quite early too, so tink i gotta turn in early too....Cya!=)

# posted by LoNeLy | 11:58 PM | 0 comments

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

I hate being at hm!Cuz there's dis monster,i call....He's taking control of everyting at hm!Argh,i juz dun wanna state everyting out here....I dunno how shld i put it,i juz noe dat i dun lyk his presence!He noes dat i dislyk him,so he's getting nearer n nearer to me,for i dunno wad stupid reason,n those stupid,irritating,childish, nonsensical actions n questions!I juz cant stand it anymore! My room,i can say he's lyk occupying it lyk his....Im getting sick of those nights spending in the living myself....The sofa is juz lyk my bed,n im getting all kind of aches spending my night der....
The way he speaks n ask mum for something,is lyk demanding la....I hear liao also not happy lo....But wad can we do?!We can oni give in to him....We cant reject him, cant shout at him, cant scold him, cant explain to him, cant cant cant everything oso CANNOT!!! For he dun listen! He's juz super duper demanding n violent towards family members la....Recently acting violent again....Throwing glasses on the floor in the middle of the nite for dunno whatever reason,waking me up,seeing my dad sobbing n cleaning up the mess after....Aww....Dis year is the year i 1st saw my dad breaking down in front of me....Not juz once,but countless times....It juz show how "filial" is he....As if my parents n me r in jail,n he's the officer in charge? So we've to abide to him so closely dat we dun even have a choice to choose?Arghh! Dis is so STUPID!!I can tolerate anyting,but juz NOT dis NONSENSE! Ok,im stopping his craps here....Ppl who r closer here,u noe wad i mean....Even if u dun,i dun mind vomitting it all out for u to hear if u wanna noe in detailed....Not for anyting,but juz to make myself feel more relieved after spitting everyting out....But i doubt anyone will wanna hear cuz ppl normally dun talk abt saddening stuffs....Nvm,i shall blow up the anger someday to myself....

Weeks ago,because of some drama taking place at hm,dad asked me something (dat requires a yes or no ans)....I dunno how to reply him,but wad i could do was juz to give a shrug on my shoulders....Tinking back,i reali feel lyk asking him the same question again,n give the same reason dat he gave me....For i reali dislyk hm!I dunno y im saying dis,but honestly,i do!Despite,i love my parents....My life's incomplete without my mum....Whenever im at hm n she's not around,there's kinda a feeling dat my heart isnt complete....I treasure my dad....Though he's quite strict,he teaches me his life's skills knowledge,give me care n guidance through my growing years....Though im not as cls to him as my mum (girls n girls communicate better),but i stil love him as much.... Den u may ask,y do i stil dislyk hm? Well,i reali dunno how to explain it....Mayb its bcuz of bro....Sometimes seeing bro so lonely without much frens,i do bother to go up to him,n chat nicely wif him....But whenever i do so,he'll start his nonsensical,irritating n childish actions/questions,which i hate most....-_- juz now,he told me dat he'll start treating me well frm now on....I dunno its for real or wad,but i've heard tons of times of it when he talks to my mum abt it....*sighs*

Y wasnt anyone der when i needed?Y was everyone busy or unavailable when i needed dem most?All i could do was to struggle myself here....
[miserable.lonely.tongku] |Looking For My Happiness| *broken heart*

# posted by LoNeLy | 4:45 PM | 0 comments

Friday, December 07, 2007

Back frm Chiangmai....Time flies....Though 8 days seemed long, but while we were der, time past so quickly, little did we know our trip was ending so soon....I miss Chiangmai!The times when we were doing cip,when we were hanging around wif frens....Its so much fun!We learn a lot too,of cuz....Ok,i miss the hotel too....Lolz....I get my own bed at nite,i've peace slping,no disturbings at all!So peaceful....Though there's prank calls by "someone" in the day,but well,its all fun n joy i had der!Memorable n unforgetable moments....

Anw,was having the runs since i reach hm on tue....Lolz!I dunno y,but heck....It cures my hunger too....Good way to jian fei....=P whatever effects it may cause....I dun care....Die den die lo....Dun tink anyone will even bother....Life is so meaningless....Xing fu zhen de bu rong yi!

Although it was hurting deep inside,but it wasnt shown on the outside....Whatever phrases n sentences ppl use,im ignoring it....Though it's not wad i mean,i dun feel lyk correcting it....Juz let dem say wad pleases dem....Wad's the point of correcting it?Dey say "a",u correct it wif "b",den dey will chunk in "c","d","e","f" and etc etc....It oni make the situation worst,rit?I dunno y im dis way!I juz hate it!Y cant i voice out for myself?Y must i swallow everyting deep down in my throat n deep inside my heart?It hurts rit to the bottom everytime i do dis!But if nobody wanna give a listening ear,nor bother me,wad can i do?Nvm,i shall b myself....
-tong ku-

# posted by LoNeLy | 9:38 AM | 0 comments

Friday, November 23, 2007

Last nite stayed up till the wee hours to chat wif dad in the living....Chat abt all my xin shi....=P its been a long time since i chatted abt my xin shi wif him....I tink the last one was when i was in lower secondary?Or even primary 6?Hahaz....Whatever....Felt relieved after sharing my feelings wif him....Bits n pieces of jokes too....=D Hahaz....Ok,its been awhile since we last joked too....Lolz....

This morning woked up by 2 calls early in the morning....Went sch to collect tshirt in the mid morning for the student exchange programme,together wif some clothes n books for the ppl living in the slums der....After dat,went to far east wif may n xue qi....On our way back,we were dead beat....Hahaz....After the long shopping?Or after a long day?Whichever....Ok,gonna catch some rest now....Tmr going pei mum have her breakfast early in the morning before she goes work,den miting him after dat....Finally,weekends r here again....=P next weekend wun b able to mit him le cuz wil b in thailand....But he's off on fri!Argh!Everytime lyk dat de....He's free when im not....T_T

# posted by LoNeLy | 9:04 PM | 0 comments

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Went vivo alone today....Take a walk liao bought some snacks back for family....Hahaz....Lolz....Suddenly found dat der got quite a lot of things to walk n to shop for....But i need some cash first....=P ok,but den i oni walk around for awhile nia cuz was having flu n it was very cold....So went back asap....Wanna go der again next time when got time....Hehez....xD

Dad fried some wanton for dinner juz now....My favourite!=) Hahaz....Hadnt been eating it for 2 months since,i tink?=P

Anw, the 2 cookie dat you gave me the other day was nice!Perhaps it ws my favourite,dat's y....=] Btw,today's 21st....:) Though we cant see nor talk to each other,but wanna say a happy 18 mths to you....xD

# posted by LoNeLy | 9:33 PM | 0 comments

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

I dunno y dis feeling hits me sometime,somewhere,somehow....Its so unpredictable....This feeling is so difficult to overcome!It makes me ponder....N it only allow me to isolate myself....I dun wish to see or entertain anyone at this point of time!I juz wan to lock myself up n solve my own problems!All right,i noe when i start thinking,i'll weep....Dats all i do....Im such a weakling!Arghh!!I hate dis part of myself....Its hard to hold back,dats y all i nid is to b alone,so dat i can drip all those stupid tears by aside(without anyone looking)!Although it does not bring me any further,wad i do is to take a short nap or to play the com....It allows me to forget those unwanted moments n i'll feel quite a bit better....=)
Okay,im getting away from it n i wan to free myself right now before anyone is back!

# posted by LoNeLy | 6:57 PM | 0 comments

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Sianz....Im soo boorreed....Nothing to do....Alone at hm wif bro n he's slping right now....Wonder wad's for today when he wakes up later....Wad'll his mood b n wad'll he do....Feel lyk going out but nowhere to go....Especially when im alone....It gets bored alone outside too!T_T Haiz....Saded....Im so lonely,so bored,so meaningless is my life....Sianz....No one's der wif me....No accompaniment....This feeling feels so bad!Im all alone here by myself....Nobody's der....Neither physically,emotionally nor mentally....No mood to do any homework or whatsoever too!Loneliness is wad's all within me now....T_T *sighs*

# posted by LoNeLy | 4:56 PM | 0 comments

Monday, November 05, 2007

Didnt manage to talk to him for the last time last nite....Now have to wait til wednasday liao....Sadz....Last nite doze off while waiting....T_T shld have put my hp right bside my side so can feel the vibration....Hahaz....

Anw,juz abit on my bro....I cant stand him always acting lyk a kiddish child at hm,asking all those nonsensical questions n expects u to ans dem!Dis is the 1st face of him....The 2nd face is when he's kinda,shld i say possesed?He can turn brutial towards u for no reason,or turn the whole hse upside down....I dunno wad's got into him,but its juz a sudden change dat few mins,sometimes hour....N after a day or two,he'll say sry....Lolz....Wad's the point if u hurt someone real deep,or if u kill him/her n den say u r sry after dat?Not everyting cures by saying a single sry....If he reali dun mean to do it,den shldnt he not do anyting rash in the first place?U'll not understand the true feelings of mine until u stay with him,under the same roof....Its so damn irritating!Not to say more,lyk demanding tings frm the hse,n oso controlling everyting,even my own room!Argh....Its lyk....Damn pissed!!Nvm....It's juz fate,i believe....

Der's quite a lot of tings i've yet to settle n do at hm,but i can oni do it when my bro isnt around....Using the com is oni available to me once in a blue moon,n sometimes i dun get to touch it at all....N wad's worst is dat the com is in my room!I've tried to ask him once to move the com to his room but he wouldnt agree to dat....But he's using it most of the time!Wan to use the com in my room so can disturb mum n me,control more tings n oso take away our rest time eh?Dis will oni make me dislike my hse even more lo....Der's no freedom at hm....I cant do anyting i lyk,not controlled by my parents,but my bro instead!Can u imagine dat?Grr....Haiz....Forget it man....

Im blogging dis post cuz he's not at hm now....Hahaz....Im so relief whenever he goes out....XD ok den,gonna go rush to do other stuffs le....Cya,ppl....=)

# posted by LoNeLy | 9:04 PM | 0 comments

Thursday, October 18, 2007

Working may be quite bored when there's no customer....Starring into blank air n the time passes so slow....Im beginging to miss the days at mos....Its filled wif fun!Although it may be tiring during peak hours,but well,the challenge to race against those long-waited customers is fun!Hahaz....Wad's more doing closing wif him is always fun....I wun feel bored cuz der's a special presence....=) Ok,i noe i chose famous amos cuz i love its products....The smell of the brownies,muffins n etc r so tempting!Feel lyk trying every single product there but i'll go bankrupt if i do so....Hahaz....Ok ok,i noe wad u gonna say....=P

Anw wanna thx darling for pei-ing me during my break time whenever possible....Travelled all the way frm boon lay juz to pei wo eat for dat 30 mins den go back liao....The other day oso go compass point wander around til i break,pei wo eat liao den wander around again til i fang gong....Sadz rit?My silly boy....=] Darx,i appreciate dat time buy my favourite waffle for me eat when i fang gong....But thought shld b jian fei-ing?Hahaz....Dun tempt me....XD

Til here den,shall blog some other days....=P

# posted by LoNeLy | 12:19 PM | 0 comments

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Completed the advanced papers today....For ss,i oni learnt chapter 1 and luckily,the question came out....If not dat's it....Hahaz....Eng the compo i anyhow write....Dunno got out of point not....Surely fail de la....Under the strict marking of her....Hahaz....Ok....

Last weekend went on cruise with mum,bro n him....3D2N cruise to nowhere....Everything was foc!=P thx to the membership card mum got with the help of auntie serene the other time....Mum stil have to earn a few hundred points before she can bring us travel futher on cruise....Perhaps phuket next time round....It sounds fun der!=) Time flew very quickly during the trip....Well,good times always flies....Enjoyed myself quite a lot though i shld b at hm studying for ss exam....Hahaz....I did bring my bk der to study but didnt had the time....I was all the while playing and fooling around,enjoying myself....Hahaz....XD

Wad we did most on the cruise was eating n eating!On fri we had 2 dinners (western n chinese cuisine) n a supper....Sat we had a dim sum breakfast with a slight touch on the western,n he n me den had 2 lunch (mediterranean n western),followed by 2 dinners (bbq n western) n a supper....Sun had a delightful western breakfast before arriving at habourfront....=P ok,im growing fatter n fatter le....Gonna start dieting liao....Hehez

Wonder when's the next cruise trip together with him again....Perhaps must wait til next year mid le ba....This time is he went on course,dats y have the chance go together de lo....Hahaz....But we slpt very late der....Dats y didnt had the chance to go view the sunrise....N the time when we wanted to go view the sunset,we were enjoying dinner at the deck....Hahaz....Next time,perhaps....=P

Ok den,mayb gonna go mit him le....Hahaz....Upload the pics taken on board the cruise some other day ba....bb =)

# posted by LoNeLy | 4:11 PM | 0 comments

Monday, September 03, 2007

Its been a week plus since i last blogged....Dunno wad to blog abt....Hahaz....Lolz

Last thur went to buy teachers' day gift....Walk around the shopping centre dunno wad to buy,so ended up buying two simple cards,writing down some thoughts for two teachers....But its a pity i dun get to buy for mr leong anymore....Hahaz

Fri went to eat sakae buffet wif him,jiayi n two more of his frens....One of his frens ordered 4 sets of sushi each for a few different types,without knowing 1 set comes in 2....Lolz....We were already very full,so ended up playing game,in which the loser had to eat up 1 sushi each (silly him,eating up my share when i lost)....Hahaz....Lucky the waiter forget abt the udon n chawamushi we all ordered too....Hahaz=P

Anw,a few pics of the present i received....

blown off 1 big candle,6 small candles left over=P

Frm da jie,xiao mei,pei shan,val n thahir

Frm sharifah

Frm mum's fren (was surprised she even noe when's my bd!):]

Sin mei's freshly home-baked cookies tastes nice=)

Frm darling

the cake darling bought on his nite's out before miting me(the wind was too strong,so couldnt take the pic wif the candle lighted)=P

Playing wif the left over candles n candle holders :D

Thx everyone for dat,to ppl who lifted up my day....Especially to darling,spending so much on dat day....Came over my hse here with the cake n my dinner,surprising me (on the way go play lan wif frens eh?)....Hahaz....1 week of ur pure sweat+blood money juz flew away lyk dat....No money liao stil spend so much....T_T Thou dis year nv celebrate wif family,but im stil as happy....Had a belated dinner wif mum at swensens' dat sat=P hmm,n not forgetting leslie,treating me n HiM to the manhattan fish market the sat before....Indulging on lobster since dunno how many years back....A seafood nite....Hahaz....Lolz....N....Nothing better to do after the dinner....

His name (with some left over sauce on the utensils after the creamy dinner-if u can see clearly).... :)

N guess who's dat?!Its ultraman!Hahaz....Lolz!

# posted by LoNeLy | 1:00 PM | 0 comments