* Welcome *
Gee Jia Xin
22 Aug 1991
Seventeen going Eighteen
mylife_jiaxin91@hotmail.com
TP, HTM. Class of 1H06
Mos Memoirs
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Monday, March 31, 2008
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A rare day dat we dun have any ssp...Supposed to be happy? Or sad? Perhaps happy for me at the beginning, but sad as time went by...I neglected them times and again for a supposing good cause to me, but u failed to show me that its worthwhile me doing it...Instead, u disappoint me times and again..T_T As mentioned, its a rare day dat we dun have any ssp...So when will u get another "good" chance of me fang xue so early? I mean, at least earlier den usual...Well, if u'll b wondering, den here's my advise: happy waiting...Probably after my Os...
I juz dunno how to express myself! I have lots of thoughts, reasons n stuffs running in mind when i ponder into it..But i dun tink i wanna state it out here...I juz........ Argh!! The feeling of u having loads to explain ur points to someone, but u juz nv get the chance to do so, nv get the chance to write out or to say to anyone else...Instead, all u can do is to have it cooped it all up in ur heart, making a deep cut right thru, leaving a wound taking forever to recover...The feeling juz sucks!Argh, dat's wad im feeling rit now!! Y can.... Nvm, i shant say...Although i reali wished i can at last, one day, take it all off my chest,i noe the day wun come...Cuz i noe myself, i wouldnt wan dis to lead to more n more doubts..But if i dun say, how r u ever gonna noe how exactly i feel? Argh, nvm, nobody will juz understand me...I shall juz understand myself..T_T
Ok,since u said dat, i'll show u i can do it den...Although im being myself now, n its tough,i'll stil gonna try very very hard to overcome all these, to b a whole new me...Probably dat will stop all this wild thoughts, imagination n comparison running thru...Will dat sastify u? Ok,im sry, i shant vent my anger here..But i meant wad i said..I juz hope dat u'll set sometime aside to tink of ur "balancing"...U tink u r reali balancing?Well, being lenient, probably a 40% is all that i can comment...I noe its not good for negligence, but if u r reali balancing, dat will b a 50-50 rit? If not there will b a lose out of 10% on the other side rit?
Juz wanted to ask how do u feel if u r expecting someting frm someone, whatever it may b, n u r thinking so hard of it, ways to break thru it so as to stop waiting, but in the end found dat the someone whom u r expecting something frm is thinking nth of it, juz being happy-go-lucky? Mayb i shall rephrase dat--> u've been waiting n thinking all along, hoping the other party will react or sth, but in the end they r juz not bothered by it, having their usual fun cycle, n dun even noe how the opposite party is feeling n/or thinking... How would dat feel? Haiz, im through wif it...I dun wanna stay at this site pondering into more imaginary n wild thoughts, leaving myself wif only a deeper cut piercing thru my heart....Juz treat it as dis post nv existed n i nv said anyting ok?Treat it as its all rubbish n nonsensical craps here....
-A Bleeding Heart-
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